audio permanently closed for inri012.
==
the roots of this track are a variation on a common theme. this is taken
from the write-up for the initial 1996 demo version of the track:
"more
silly teenage angst, intersecting with more rejection of religion and
quite a bit of misanthropy. i may make an interesting observation or
two, but the reality here is that i sound just as brainwashed as the
masses of people i was looking down on...and if i'm going to criticize
myself, or feel embarrassed, it's on that level of a lack of
originality, rather than the actual content."
by 1998, the
lyrics had been rewritten to be a little less angsty in an attempt to
expand further on the secular humanist basis of the track. yet, i still
don't really get over the irony inherent in the track. as much as i want
to break free of mindlessness and conformity, i don't have anything
particularly original to say. worse, the way i'm saying it is cliched,
childish and kind of trite. for these reasons, i've decided to eject the
vocal mixes from the official release altogether, although they are
available here as a part of the download.
musically speaking, i
initially actually wanted this track to be the basis of something more
marketable. i remember listening to the first side of the initial demo
and lamenting that it was void of anything i could really release as a
single and then trying to come up with some kind of "jangle" or
"college" rock thing to compensate for it. in the end, the track would
warp into some kind of adult prog, but you can hear the initial buckian
template in the guitar work.
as with a number of the other tracks
from this period, i don't really want to walk anything back - i just
wish that i had articulated myself better. it's not the subject matter
that's cringey, it's the exact choice of words. yet, that's a scant
excuse, in context. word choice is what writing is all about!
the
decision to create a single for the track in 2016 was drawn out by two
considerations. the first is that there are legitimately two distinct
modern versions of the track, along with a collection of discarded
mixes, and i do feel the need to offer them together as a package, as i
have done with the other tracks. the other is that this is literally the
only song on the first demo that is not offered in this format. i felt
that it would be absurd for me to offer every track as a single except
for this one.
the lead track on this single combines the album
version with the connector that follows it on the record, which explains
the chosen release date (the actual song was completed on march 22,
1998). that connector is one of the many pieces of sample art that i had
created over this period in cool edit, using a number of basic
manipulation tactics and noise generation techniques. i had to emulate
this in 2016 in order to rebuild the record. while the result is not
identical, it is actually pretty close.
initially written in
1996. recreated in the spring of 1998. a failed rescue was attempted in
2013. reclaimed june 29, 2015. corrected to control for malfunctioning
electronics on nov 26, 2015. sequenced on jan 10, 2016. released & finalized on
july 24, 2016. as always, please use headphones.
this release is compiled on inriℵ0.
jasonparent.bandcamp.com/merch/inri-box-set
regarding the subject matter of the deleted vocals/lyrics, please see the following vlog (which is also available on inriℵ0):
www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuhdwde1YKI&t=778s
credits:
j - guitars, effects, bass, drum programming, drum kit, sequencing, vocals, sampling, found sound (printer), cool edit, digital wave editing, tapes, production
released may 22, 1998
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/i-think-i-feel-much-better-now
1) this is the version that was sequenced for the record, before it was split into two tracks for it. initially written in 1996. recreated in the spring of 1998. a failed rescue was attempted in 2013. reclaimed june 29, 2015. corrected to control for malfunctioning electronics on nov 26, 2015. sequenced on jan 10, 2016.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/i-think-i-feel-much-better-now
2) this is the version that was reconstructed in 2015 from the 1998 source tapes. initially written in 1996. recreated in the spring of 1998. a failed rescue was attempted in 2013. reclaimed june 29, 2015. corrected to control for malfunctioning electronics on nov 26, 2015.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/aliens-are-more-likely-than-god-2
3) from the deleted inricycled B compilation. initially written in 1996. recreated in the spring of 1998. remastered in 2013. recycled jan 7, 2014.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/climb-up-a-cloud-to-combat-some-hideous-creatures-and-then-fly-away-hidden
4) 2013 remaster of 1996 demo. initially written in 1996. remastered in 2013. dated oct 21, 2013.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/guh-2013-remaster-of-1996-demo-2
5) deleted 2013 remaster of 1998 demo cd. initially written in 1996. recreated in the spring of 1998. a failed rescue was attempted in 2013. dated dec 21, 2013.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/i-think-i-feel-much-better-now-2013-remaster-of-1998-cd-2
6) deleted original 1996 mix. initially written in 1996. dated nov 24, 1996.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/guh-1996-demo-2
7) deleted original 1998 sequence from the initial demo cd. initially written in 1996. recreated in the spring of 1998. the first section is from mar 22, 1998 and the second section is from may 22, 1998.
https://jasonparent.bandcamp.com/track/i-think-i-feel-much-better-now-1998-cd-2
